This morning there were two slightly tip-toe challenged 12-year-olds climbing the stairs to the X-Box at 6.30am! At this point I thought how can they be awake after our late night of pizza and karting? And then a thought occurred, YouTube was being put on. YouTube is the bain of my life for one simple reason. A few years ago when Long Legs discovered the joys of videos on YouTube, I discovered when he typed in Sponge-Bob videos, up popped a whole heap of videos which involved Sponge-Bob and Patrick doing unmentionables! Not what he was searching for but offered to him on a plate none-the-less. Ever since I have banned, blocked and restricted only to find out yesterday afternoon that the X-Box can also access YouTube and there was LL1 and LL2 watching a joke channel all their friends are watching and as I walked in to see what they were squawking at, out popped an expletive!
Now I know all tweenagers hear these words and probably use these words when they are smart enough to know a parent, teacher, adult is not listening. However, my ASD boy is not known for the practiced art of looking around to see who's listening before trying out these words. Another reason why I avoid his exposure to expletives as much as possible is because it's easier for those with communication challenges to use 'easily processed words', phrases that come to mind without difficulty in the course of their communication attempts which can lead to inappropriate exchanges. You may find you have a child who when you speak to them appears appear deaf. You are probably asking them to do something which is either boring, unfamiliar or too complicated for their brains to process. However, say 'would you like some chocolate?' and the response is instant. Sound familiar? Chocolate is familiar, desirable and the request is uncomplicated.
So whilst we obviously try to educate him about appropriate language and how social interactions can be affected by the language used, we also only try to expose him to the modelling we actually want him to copy. Which does not involve 'Yo Mumma' or whatever it's called on YouTube. Thankfully, 10 minutes later, the roar of F1 engines started up and I closed my eyes again. I eventually got up to find a sight I imagine will become much more familiar as the years go on; two boys playing X-Box eating last night's cold pizza. I then offered them birthday cake, as any good mother does, just to enhance their nutritional intake for the morning. It was made with strawberry butter icing ok? LL1 had a minor meltdown when LL2 had to leave early to go and play his cricket match. He left with a request to come back later and if it wasn't for the fact they both have to go back to school on Monday, I could guarantee we would have been in for another 4 day sleepover.
Today the Short One had an OT appointment so I offered the husband the choice of taking him or doing 2 weeks worth of washing (it has been the school holidays!). He opted for the latter option so I found myself having to re-phrase his choices into 'you are going to OT today, you have to be there by 11.' It's not unusual for the mother to do all the therapy appointments, go to the workshops, read the books etc. I know there are many Dads out there doing a great job too, so I by no means intend to offend or say that all Dads leave it to the Mums, but generally speaking amongst my friends who have children with ASD, it's the female of the species who tends to do the lion's share. I know my husband is put off by the thought that he doesn't feel he knows what he's meant to be doing because I do attend these appointments 99.9% of the time due to the fact he works. When the opportunity does present itself, however, in the form of a Saturday appointment, I won't deny not having to do it occasionally is good for my sanity as much as it is for him to actually to have a more active role. As much as my husband respects my opinion, it is not unusual for me to tell him the way we have to do things and for him to question it or not quite get the point. But have a therapist say exactly the same thing and it tends to register more. I'm not offended. I get exhausted and want to slam my head against the kitchen bench on occasion. But I never get offended.
The husband has been a child today and itched to make birthday Lego and go to the local theme park to play. He got his wish for one, as I had a lunch with my Uni lecturer, so he got to go off and play at the water park. The Short One was not impressed by my not taking him to OT and he was equally unimpressed as we played tag team when he got back from OT to receive a quick kiss from me as I walked out of the door. I enjoyed my few hours of being an adult, I will not lie. LL2 was due to come back to stay over after a day of cricket but apparently passed out on his sofa at home. Needless to say, LL1 had a minor meltdown. I honestly expected something more and I donned the steel knight's armour in readiness so was hugely relieved when he coped with his disappointment. I must commend LL2's mother for her understanding of LL1 who told me she had even tried putting ice on LL2's face to wake him up because she knew how upset LL1 would be. I cherish friends like her. They really are one in a million. I am super proud of my boy though for coping so well today with his two disappointments.
Now let's talk dosh. Today the Short One's OT was $170 and then with petrol to and fro which was quite considerable as the OT is 40 minutes drive away plus the every day medications etc. I think it's fair to say today cost us $185. Til tomorrow x
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